What Makes Me Feel Old

My oldest daughter is in the second grade and she's turning 8 in November.

I've now hit 25 and a whole new age group on paperwork.

My first job when I was 16 has since been torn down and is now a Starbucks.

Where I got my prom pictures taken is now a vacant lot.

It's just a few but it's enough to make me see that nothing good will come of being in the mid twenties. But I'm still young enough to make my boyfriend's old ass ex jealous that he moved on with someone better and she's got her own rejects.

Start of School

My little Miss Gwen is now officially a second grader. She's going to the same school as last year and kindergarten. I don't want her to have to go to yet another school and start off as the new kid all over again. She's happy at this school and she's well liked. She got all her school shopping done. Even though the teacher can't make up her mind what school supplies she wants. She got new clothes, even thought she's still fits into the clothes she got last year. A girl's got to have clothes. I think she was less nervous this year than the last couple years. She went with her teacher and didn't hang on my side. Means my little girl is growing up so fast. She's already saying she's a big girl now and not to call her baby girl or a little girl anymore. I'm not ready for her to be so grown up. But I know my little girl is growing up and I'm hoping I can teach her and be half the mom that my mother was.

What the Fuck?

I'll never understand why a man would have to pay so much child support for kids that are pretty much grown. How could you pay so much and the mom still can't afford anything. I think if they money really was being used on the kids, they shouldn't need anything. Even when she was getting the full amount every week, he was still a dead beat. What the fuck ever. My boyfriend's ex needs to get a life or if money is that tight get a job to take care of your own kids better. I raise my daughter for 7 years without a dime of child support. (Not that I wanted any from her father) And she had everything she wanted and needed. So women just can't do it own there own. I guess that's what happens when you're kids are nothing but dollar signs to you. I feel sorry for them all.

Busy Busy Busy

For the next month or things around here are going to be pretty busy. A storage unit is opening up this weekend so that means we have to start getting the things we want to take with us ready to move out. Most of it we're probably going to leave behind. A few pieces of furniture will probably go depending on if it's able to be clean professionally. That must be why I loath dogs. Most of it came be junked to minimize the load we're moving. He's giving his mom some cabinets that I don't want We're not supposed to be moving back up there until April but I say I have the money now, let's hit the road. The more I sit and think about it, the less I want to wait that much longer. Gwen and Presley's Grandma is ready and waiting to take the kids shopping. Gwen will no longer have to wear a uniform to school and Presley never will, thankfully.This weekend is my birthday and Valentine's Day. We made plans to go out to a casino and dinner. Which is great, we do need some time out but I'm not wanting to be without my babies. Not even for one night. The only time I was away from Presley was when he was in the NICU for a week and two days. And since I left work, I've been with Gwen every night. Unless we go see the new Friday the 13th movie, then I'm here. It opens on my birthday but the way I've been feeling, I won't want to go anywhere. My engagement ring set came in the other day but Darryell said I can't get the engagement ring until my birthday and the wedding band I have to put up until we do get married. I rallied for the move over the wedding. So we moved it back again.I'm hoping the drama will settle down after we move. It's becoming a bit much. There's always two sides to every story and of course the stories people make up to have a personal pity party but I don't care. Let's make up stuff to make the other person look bad but when it all catches up, someone will feel retarded. Hell, I don't care. I have my babies and I'm getting what I want with this move, so anyone who has something negative to say about that can fuck off because I really don't care. My life is well, my babies are healthy, I'm happy as hell to be moving home or somewhere around there and that's all I need. My kids and I may be spoiled but at least we're respectful to the man who's up rooting his life to make us happy.

Almost Time

It's getting that much closer to us moving. We're starting to move things out this weekend, finally. We rented a storage unit and a moving truck and we even formulated a plan for when we do move to Indiana. Darryell had to deliver a vacuum truck to Baton Rouge, so that put our moving schedule behind for the day. But I'm sure we'll get caught up this weekend. Also this weekend Darryell wants to take us to some Mardi Gras parades. Which I'm sure will be fun and it sounds like a great photo opportunity. Gwen is looking forward to them as well. She's been asking all week when Mardi Gras is.I had to break down and renew my drivers licenses down here. I was hoping I could just wait until we're back up there but the wager periods up there isn't long enough for the time frame that we'd be moving. So, it looks like Louisiana has sucked me in. At least now I'm legit again to drive. (Um, I let mine expire.) I'm hoping to get a tattoo or two before we leave. Darryell buddy from work is a tattoo artist, so he's going to talk him into a good deal for a couple tattoos. That means I have to figure out what I want to get with the kids names and birthdays. My Valentine's ring finally came in and it's so pretty. I'll have to put a picture of it on here whenever I get around to taking one. I feel so lame. He went out of his way to pick out the perfect rings for my birthday/Valentine's Day and out wedding band sets and I got him some shoot 'em up games for the PlayStation 2 and the Wii. And I'm slowly puling him into the Guitar Hero. We're still feeling the effects of playing games on Wii. My arms are so sore. We're looking through some designs for a Mother's ring for Mother's Day, so I thought I'd look for a perfect Dad's ring for him for Father's Day. Something special for Presley's Daddy. For the time being we're concentrating on the move up there. And of course I've planned some side trips that could take us out of our way. I want to see some things in New Orleans before we leave Louisiana. There's so Mardi Gras museums and a World Was II museum that look pretty cool and of course I want to go to a small little town to see a Bonnie and Clyde museum and the marker in the place where they were gunned down. And when we're going through Tennessee I want to see Graceland. You know I'm going to see that.Well, Presley is going to be getting back up and I have some laundry and dishes to do and Darryell should be getting back from Baton Rouge sometime soon. I've got to get busy.

Mid_March

I have caught another cold. I feel like crap and my body isn't feeling to well either. I think it's all the late nights catching up with me. I've been feeling super tired the past couple weeks which I figured it was from working out and not being used to it and now I've got a cold. Darryell's been home for the past week and a half and I've tried to catch up on some sleep but it hasn't help thus far. Go figure it comes when I need to be 100%. With us planning to be moved out by this weekend and cookies that need to be baked for a school's bake sale for this weekend and with Presley perfecting his military crawl, I'm always up and going. I'm hoping a few days of rest will do me good.In the kids' lives, Presley is one step closer to crawl but that little boy can so move on his belly. He has a tendency to go for the game systems and controllers. With all the toys that baby has, he goes for the things we just took him from. He's great. He's cut his bottom two teeth. He was like his sister and was a very good when it came to teething. No fussing or anything just one day, he had cut his tooth. He loves to smile and I can't wait to get some pictures of his smile with teeth. The same week he cut his teeth, Gwen lost a baby tooth and was so excited when the Tooth Fairy brought her a dollar. I'm ready to go back home to show the kids' Mamaw, Papaw and Uncle Bubby how much they've have grown. My mom and dad have been super great help checking out houses for us. Thankfully because without them checking these places out, we would have bought the first one we were interested in and it would have been a lemon. The guy on the phone told us it was $3,000 down, $450 a month for 10 years for a three bedroom, two bath on two city lots but it needed some carpet and drywall. Yeah, sounds good over the phone. My parents check it out and it has unlevel floors that need fixed before the carpet goes down, there's holes in the walls of every room, there's a hole in the roof causing water to leak in and as a result, the ceiling in the bedroom upstairs needs replaced. Heck if we wanted to do all that, he'd work harder to keep this place and fix it up. But the only reason he isn't is because I want to go home.I had one of my random Amber moments and decided I was going to streak my hair purple so I went out and bought purple and pink hair dye. And when I got the urge and some foil, I bleached streaks in my hair and when it hits me again, I may do some purple. But I don't know, I'm usually a anti dye your hair at home person but it comes with the territory of being random. We're setting up a time to get me a couple tattoos. Nothing big, of course.....yet. All I was is the kids first and middle names with a heart. I'm so excited for that.Well, it's time for the bus and Presley's on the move again, laundry needs folded, dishes put away, things need packed and moved and all the means, I need to get busy.

Another Day

Today it's just me and Presley around the house. Gwen stayed the night with her Grandparents and Darryell's at work. I can't get used to him working Saturdays but at least he's not working extremely long hours in another start like before. But Presley keeps me busy, so I don't have time to miss him. Gwen on the other hand, she would rather be at her Grandparents house or with her Uncle Bubby. Last weekend (the one without the rain) she helped Grandpa get the pool ready and she dug up her bathing suits and it's been raining ever since. We're hoping the weather warms up sometime soon. I think the kids going crazy being stuck in the house for the past week. We need some sun. She's doing very well in school. She's loves getting up and getting ready and never fights to go to school like she did down there. We drop her off right at the door. So I'm no longer paranoid about her riding a bus. However, I was seriously stressin' during her Indy Zoo field trip last week. Shopping was the only way I could deal. But she made it home without any problems. She has another field trip next week, so I'll start all over again. She's been playing the drums for the Guitar Hero band set. And don't mess with her when she's in the zone. She's ready for summer and has been talking about being a 2nd grader next year.My baby boy is growing like a bad weed. He's already into 12 month clothes and is trying his hardest to walk. He can walk himself down the edge of the couch but when he lets go, he goes straight down. I've had my first causality of his crawling phase. Yesterday he made his way through all his toys, right into the kitchen and tried to pull himself up on the first thing he came across...the mop bucket. Needless to say, when we was done I had to mop again. No biggie. I was more stressed about getting the Mop & Glow off him. My poor baby. He unorganised my very anally organised DVDs everyday. But he's so cute when he goes it. One at a time like he's looking for something to watch. And sometimes he'd rather be with his Daddy over me and sometimes Gwen over Daddy and me but he's a very happy, healthy and spoiled baby. He the funnest person I know and I love waking up to him every morning. Sorry Darryell.I'm the same for the most part. I've been feeling sick, tired and just plain moody lately. I hope I'm not getting sick again. But with all this crap going around, I'm glad I buy my hand sanitizer in the huge bottle. But I'm not worried about me. My kids are what's important. My landlord is completely incompete. He has the need to tell story after story and think I really believe what he says. But I pay the rent and hope he won't come back for a while. He wants to make sure rent is on time, yet he's the one who owes the guy who owns the house a ton of back payments. He's the kind of people who complains about people not using spell check but doesn't use it himself. Now I'm one of those people he talk crap online but if you meet this guy, you'd be left wondering what the hell was that guy even talking about. I better get this over with. It's still early but I've got to go to the store.